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hivemuthur · 13 days ago

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The Game of Teaching Body - Ch. 6.

viktorxfemale!reader mature! (for now, I will mark later chapters as explicit when the time comes)

AU university, AU modern era, slow burn, frenemies to lovers, teasing, pinning, banter, eventual romance and therefore smut, Viktor is simultaneously a menace and needs a hug, TA Viktor

Ch.1. | Ch.2. | Ch.3. | Ch.4. | Ch.5. | Ch.7. | Ch.8. | Ch.9. | Ch.10. | Ch.11. | Ch.12.

word count: 5K

tag: #the game of teaching body

summary: ok, so my notes on AO3 reminded me how actually this fic crawled into my brain and it was with Drugs in Our Body. So, what should happen after this chapter is whatever happens in DiOB - it serves as somewhat floating chapter. The story can be read without it, but there might be some gaps in the next and future chapters, as I reference it briefly. So, it's ch.6. -> DiOB -> ch.7. I hope that makes sense, I don't know who I think I am, doing this kind of stuff.

Cross-posted on AO3 + POV3rd Person Version

—

“A C?” you gasped as you opened your paper, the glaring red C screaming at your incompetence. How could this happen? You’d worked on it for an entire week. You turned the paper around, desperate for any explanation, but all you found was Heimerdinger’s poetic scrawl: ‘Not entirely botched but needs more work. Seek and you shall find, Y/N. You can give me a fix-up if you want a higher grade.’

“Don’t worry, I got a D,” Sue sighed, her arms falling to her sides, the paper crumpled in one hand. She hadn’t put in nearly as much effort, spending most of the week hanging out with Alice and doing what she smugly referred to as “girl stuff.”

“Yes, but I put in about a month’s worth of research for this,” you muttered, the frustration spilling out before you could stop it. You caught Sue’s glare and quickly backtracked. “I’m not saying you didn’t! I just… I don’t understand.”

“Well, he says you can fix it. He didn’t say that on mine, look,” Sue said, holding up the crumpled paper. The note read: ‘Not bad. Could be better. Pay more attention to details next time. H.’

“You could ask Viktor for help?” Sue offered faintly; her eyebrows raised. You inhaled sharply, preparing to unleash a tirade of insults about why that was the absolute last thing you would ever do. But before you could, Sue hastily amended, “Or Jayce! He has office hours in the afternoon, or so I’ve heard.”

“I… guess you’re right,” you said, letting out the breath you’d been holding. Seeing Viktor in class was already more than enough to deal with. He acted as if nothing had happened, which only made you more furious. That anger had sharpened even further when Angus had texted to ask you out for coffee, leaving your stomach tied in knots as you agreed.

You met him at a cosy pub near campus, the same one you used to frequent with Hale, Sue, Jayce, Mel, and, well… Viktor—though only because he was coerced, not because you wanted him there. Angus asked you question after question, and you found it surprisingly easy to talk to him. You told him funny stories about your parents being new age freaks, about how much you loved your mum’s Polish cooking, and how your dad had kept you in a strict yoga routine since you were six, grooming you to take over his practice.

You admitted how you’d chosen genetics instead, a quiet rebellion against your mum’s recall healing teachings—only to discover there was some truth to them, realising that everything in the universe was connected.

Angus was fascinated. He told you about his three brothers, who’d gone into law and programming, and how he was the family’s scapegoat. He spoke warmly about his close bond with his mum and his dream of running a facility to help kids overcome trauma through theatre and dance.

You praised him for it, but when he misread your words as an invitation and leaned in to kiss you, you froze. He stopped, eyebrows raised, waiting for you to explain. All you could manage was a clumsy explanation that you’d had a wonderful time, but it made you realise you needed to sort out your own issues first.

He laughed, a soft, knowing sound. “I had a feeling it wasn’t going to be straightforward,” he said lightly.

He seemed like the kind of guy who could easily find someone else, but the thought still left your heart aching. And somehow, it was all Viktor’s fault.

The way he never asked about any of those things. The way he only asked where you were from to wind you up.

You braced yourself through the day, slogging through classes and lectures with the weight of that damned paper gnawing at you. By the time the sky turned dark, you found yourself reluctantly heading back to the science lab, resolved to ask Jayce for help. It felt strange to ask him instead of Viktor—like you were dodging some inescapable fate.

Jayce had always been approachable, quick to befriend the “fresh meat.” If there were any rules about student-TA relationships, he seemed to ignore them with a confidence that made you smile. Viktor, on the other hand… well, he was a different beast entirely.

Stuffing a banana into your mouth as you walked, you caught a glimpse of your reflection in one of the school’s tall windows. Not great, but not tragic either. The real issue was the way your face—mid-chewing—gave away just how much crying you’d been doing. It was painfully obvious, even to you.

You barged into the TA’s office without a second thought. “Hey, Jayce, do you have some time to take a look at this?” you asked, your focus entirely on digging through your bag, where the cursed paper had been unceremoniously shoved earlier.

But when you looked up, you froze.

The person at the desk wasn’t Jayce. It was Viktor.

He glanced up at you, eyebrows raised in surprise at your abrupt entrance. And there it was—already forming—the smirk you hated so much. Before he could unleash one of his insufferable remarks, you scrambled to backtrack.

“Shit, sorry. I thought it was Jayce’s hours. I’ll come back some other time,” you blurted, already halfway out the door.

“Please, don’t be ridiculous,” he said, standing up too quickly, his hand wobbling on his cane. You saw it but decided not to step in to help. “I can take a look.”

His voice carried a careful edge, and you hesitated. You didn’t trust him—not after the last time. He had crossed a line, and you’d felt the sting of it for days. He knew it too. He saw it in the way your body tensed every time he leaned over your workbench in class to offer advice, advice you now refused to take. He saw it now, in the faint swelling of your face, the traces of tears you hadn’t managed to hide.

He knew it had been wrong the moment you stormed out of his office that day, leaving him slumped in his chair with a quiet “Shit,” slipping from his mouth.

Now, as you lingered in the doorway, Viktor saw a chance to make amends. He wasn’t going to let it slip through his fingers.

You eyed him suspiciously before finally handing over the paper, reluctant and still keeping your distance. Viktor perched himself on the edge of the desk, flipping through your work, his sharp eyes scanning for Heimerdinger’s signature wisdom.

“Ah, right. He can’t be bothered to write more than this,” Viktor huffed, reading the vague ‘Seek and you shall find.’

“Thankfully, I made notes for you on this one,” he said, glancing up to meet your eyes. There was a genuine effort in his grin that made you uneasy.

“Wasn’t it supposed to be Jayce’s hours?” you asked, crossing your arms as you watched him pull a set of notes from his bag. Why would he make notes for you in advance? It didn’t add up. Was this some elaborate act to stage a redemption arc for himself?

“Why? Has your focus shifted already?” Viktor’s retort slipped out before he could stop it. The playful edge in his voice made your spine straighten, ready to snap back with a sharp response. But before you could, he quickly softened his tone.

“He’s sick,” Viktor said, his gaze steady, almost remorseful. “I’m covering for him.”

You didn’t know whether to believe him, but the vulnerability in his tone threw you off balance. For once, it seemed like Viktor wasn’t trying to wind you up—or at least, not entirely.

You didn’t say anything at first, but you leaned in closer, your gaze falling to the notes Viktor had spread out on the desk. That familiar scent of his—body wash, something clean and sharp, mingled with freshly washed wool—drifted to you. It was oddly comforting, though you couldn’t quite figure out why it felt so… intimate.

He tapped a finger on the first section of your paper, pointing to where you had rushed to conclusions, skipping the part where you should have explained how you’d arrived at your findings. “You’ve got solid results,” he said, his voice low and patient, “but Heimerdinger’s mark was his way of telling you that your argument is missing a crucial part. You skipped over how you proved your hypothesis—how you got to the results you did.”

You nodded, following his finger as he guided you through the mistakes you hadn’t even noticed before. His advice was precise, practical, and, oddly enough, warm. It wasn’t just about correcting your errors—it was the care he was taking with you. He wasn’t simply telling you what was wrong; he was showing you how to fix it, step by step, as though it actually mattered to him.

“This part here,” Viktor continued, tapping another section, “it’s the hardest part for most students. The construction of the paper—the logic of it. That’s what gets people. You didn’t make any mistakes in your research or results. It’s just the way you laid everything out. This is the part most academics struggle with. It just takes practice.”

You swallowed, warmth rushing through your chest. You couldn’t tell if it was the unexpected kindness or the fact that he was taking the time to explain everything so thoroughly, but something inside you shifted. Your shoulders relaxed, and the tension you’d been carrying eased, just a little.

For a moment, you let your guard down. You allowed yourself to actually listen, to trust in what he was saying. But as his steady, warm tone settled over you, a flicker of confusion took hold. Was this real? Was he being this careful with you because he cared? Or were you just imagining it, reading too much into the moment?

Your mind raced, a swirl of emotions and doubts tumbling over one another. It had only been a few days since that… moment. You weren’t sure if you were holding on to the idea of it or if Viktor’s actions now were a sign that something had shifted between you.

You glanced at him. His focus was entirely on your paper, his expression neutral. But something in his eyes made your heart beat just a little faster. Was he really this warm, or was it just the warmth of the moment? You couldn’t tell.

“How is your hand?” he asked suddenly, pulling you out of your thoughts. His gaze drifted to the small bandage covering the alkaline burn from the other day. The question seemed to slip out unbidden, and you weren’t sure if you appreciated the reminder.

You blinked, thrown back to that moment by the sink: his voice sharp and cutting, his dark eyes boring into you, his fingers pressing gently against your wrist as his mouth asked, “Why are you not wearing gloves?”

Your pulse quickened as you quickly tugged your sleeve over the bandage, concealing the mark. “It’s fine,” you said, taking a step back.

He spoke your name softly, his hand darting out to stop you. This time, his movement wasn’t hesitant, wasn’t unsure, as it had been before. His fingers closed around your wrist—not roughly, but firmly enough that you couldn’t slip away.

He turned your hand palm-up and carefully began peeling the bandage away. The gentleness of the motion disarmed you, and you stood frozen, watching as his sharp eyes inspected the wound beneath.

You winced at the gesture, and Viktor presumed it was painful, though your face twisted more because here he was, exposing you once again. “Don’t be such a baby,” he chuckled.

“I could say the same to you,” you muttered under your breath. Viktor only shot you a glance, laced with a knowing smile.

“It’s looking good. Let it air out once in a while,” he said. This would be the moment to release your hand, but he couldn’t help himself; he held it for a little while longer. He was about to mention how you could always count on him for help with essays and long-term homework, just to cement the quiet truce between you. But you beat him to it.

“You don’t know the first thing about me.” It blurted out before you could stop it. It just shot out of your mouth like an overworked spring.

Viktor was taken aback. His mouth hung open for a moment as he processed your words. What exactly did you mean by that? It was a challenge you threw without thinking. But he could take it. The silence between you stretched, and when you started to retreat your hand, about to mutter an apology, he spoke, hesitantly.

“I… I know you’re half-Polish,” he said, offering a sheepish smile, as if apologizing for how he’d gathered this information. You shot him a glare, but Viktor wasn’t deterred.

“I also know you’re into genetics.” Your sigh was almost audible. These were the things most people knew about you by now. But he wasn’t finished.

“I know that you know Hamilton by heart.” You raised an eyebrow, but he pressed on.

“I know you don’t abandon your friends when they need you. I know you’re ambitious, smart, and funny. I know you laugh at silly, dry chemistry jokes. I know you chew on your pencil when you’re focused.” Your breath hitched slightly, but you stayed silent.

“I know…” he hesitated, his voice softening, “how warm your hands are when you get… excited.” He knew so much more about you but was too afraid to say it. He knew the feeling of your fingers on his scalp as you pulled him closer into a kiss. He knew the taste of your tongue and the sound of little gasps you made when he touched you. He memorized it all and replayed it over and over again in his mind.

You swallowed hard, feeling a strange mix of warmth and nerves twirling inside you. You didn’t speak, just looked at him, and Viktor, not certain about the effect of his confession, refused to meet your gaze. His touch on your hand was tender now, softer than before.

He cleared his throat, finally asking, “So… what do you know about me?” You blinked, thrown off by the question. You answered quickly, not thinking too much about it.

“I know you’re Czech… and that you’re a sad fart.”

Viktor couldn’t help but laugh at that, the sound light and unexpected in the air between you. You felt the tension lift, just a little, as you shared this strange, awkward moment. He released your hand and leaned back against the desk, looking at you with a raised eyebrow, his voice carrying a mix of humour and something more sincere.

“Well, it seems that we need to work on that. I’m so much more than a sad fart. I’m also a stiff, meticulous bastard, I’ll remind you.” He pointed a joking finger in your direction as you rolled your eyes.

“What do you have in mind, then?” you asked, your tone still guarded but tinged with curiosity.

“A… ceasefire?” Viktor suggested, his smile lingering, though his gaze softened slightly. “At least for now.”

Your lips twitched into a half-smile. “As long as you promise not to shoot me in the back.”

Viktor chuckled softly under his breath. “I might have a history of unsportsmanlike conduct, but perhaps we could… start over? Unless, of course, Angus…”

You raised an eyebrow at that, feeling a grin tug at the corners of your mouth. “Oh, you wish I told you,” you teased, your tone a playful challenge rather than an outright denial. “But yes, a ceasefire and a do-over I can accept. No dirty moves, Viktor.”

He leaned in ever so slightly, his voice still playful but with an edge of something deeper. “I solemnly swear.” He held up a hand in mock sincerity before smirking. “No dirty moves… this time.”

His gaze lingered on you, the teasing glint still present, but there was an undercurrent of something else in his tone. He wasn’t making it clear—what exactly were the two of you trying again? Was it just the tentative friendship, the awkward truce formed after your bickering? Or was it something more?

You couldn’t shake the feeling that he might be pushing for something beyond the ceasefire, though he wasn’t saying it outright. Perhaps it was just your imagination, overthinking again, but the uncertainty made you uneasy. You wanted to keep your distance, to hold the upper hand, but something in Viktor’s manner made you hesitate.

Your fingers brushed the edge of your notebook, a telltale sign of your nerves as you glanced up at him. “You’re really not going to elaborate, are you?” you asked, giving him a look that was equal parts challenge and curiosity.

Viktor shrugged, his expression a mix of amusement and caution. “What’s to elaborate? We’re starting over. That’s enough for now, isn’t it?”

You bit your lip, refusing to let him see how much his words made your pulse quicken. Instead, you smirked, masking the flutter of emotions beneath a calm exterior. “As long as you don’t get any funny ideas.”

His gaze softened slightly, though the teasing glint in his eyes remained. “No funny ideas. For now, anyway.” He straightened, placing his hands back on the desk, but the space between you still felt charged and unfinished.

***

To seal the deal, both you and Viktor made an equal effort to keep things neutral—meeting among friends, in public spaces, testing the waters of this truce. One such occasion found you at the pub with the usual group of six, an outing entirely orchestrated by Viktor.

He and Jayce weren’t exactly studying; instead, they were buried in notes, trying to distil their findings into a polished research summary for Heimerdinger. Across the table, Mel and Hale were prepping for their theatre history exam, their discussions frequently devolving into competitive banter as they lobbed historical facts at each other in an effort to outdo one another.

Sue, ever diligent, was rewriting her entire textbook into her notebook as if the act itself would cement the knowledge in her brain. Meanwhile, you were seated cross-legged on the floor, quietly working on your genetics paper, tuning out the chatter as best you could.

The group was a collage of concentration and lively exchanges when you simultaneously let out a yawn and your stomach grumbled loudly, the sound cutting through the general din of the pub.

Viktor’s eyebrows shot up, and he glanced at you over the rim of his notes, his tone wry as he spoke. “Feels like there is more than one need to address here.”

You shifted uncomfortably, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks. You quickly moved a hand over your belly as if to stifle the sound. “Uh, I don’t suppose they have sandwiches here?”

“They do!” Jayce chimed in enthusiastically, leaning forward with sudden interest. Food always seemed to pull his attention from whatever he was working on. “And not the worst ones, either.”

Viktor exhaled with a knowing sigh; his expression lightly amused. “Eh, they are… not bad,” he conceded. His tone softened, and he leaned slightly forward, tilting his head in your direction. “What say you?”

You hesitated for only a second before Viktor began rising from his seat. He moved with a kind of deliberate precision, setting his notes neatly onto the side table. You noticed how his gaze briefly flicked to Jayce’s writing, his lips twitching in approval before returning his focus to you.

“Uh, sure,” you said, already scrambling up from the floor. Your papers lay abandoned dangerously close to the pub’s cozy fireplace, but you didn’t notice. Instead, as you rose, you wobbled awkwardly, your leg prickling with the unmistakable sensation of pins and needles. You grabbed onto Hale’s shoulder for balance. “Sorry, my leg fell asleep.”

Viktor smirked, his hand resting lightly on the head of his cane as he stood. “Are you trying to copy me?”

You grinned despite yourself. “Totally. Can I borrow that?” You reached out toward his cane, your eyes glinting with playful defiance.

Viktor raised an eyebrow, his smirk deepening as he straightened his posture slightly. “You can try,” he said, holding the cane a fraction tighter as if to make a point. “But I warn you, it comes with certain… responsibilities.”

“Oh, I bet it does,” you quipped, brushing past him toward the bar. “I can see myself torturing students with such a vigilant symbol of authority,” you added, throwing him a smirk over your shoulder.

Viktor followed, limping slightly but keeping pace with you, his expression caught somewhere between amusement and exasperation as he shook his head.

Behind you, Jayce called out, “Grab me something too!” but neither you nor Viktor paid him any mind.

Hale sighed deeply, finally turning his head away from Mel, who had been poised to deliver another historical fact to outdo him. Instead, his gaze followed you and Viktor as you approached the bar.

“That,” Hale said, his voice low and contemplative, his eyes fixed on you and Viktor as you waited for your coffees at the counter, “will either be beautiful or tragic. Or both.”

“I’m sorry, what are we looking at?” Sue asked, peering over her notebook.

“Our dear friends poking at each other’s hearts,” Hale replied with theatrical solemnity, folding his arms dramatically.

Jayce let out a loud laugh, shaking his head. “Get out, Hale. Viktor would never.”

“Oh, he already did. Just… look at them,” Hale insisted, gesturing subtly in your direction.

Mel perked up, abandoning her train of thought on Renaissance theatre entirely. “Alright, that’s way more interesting than theatre history. Show me what you’re seeing.”

“Alright, kids,” Hale said, sitting up straighter and adopting the tone of a sage sharing forbidden wisdom. “I will share my magic with you, just this once. Look at Viktor. He’s already deep in. See how he’s leaning toward her? I bet he’s saying everything as quiet as possible, so she has to get closer.”

Four heads turned toward the bar, studying the scene unfolding by the counter. Sure enough, your head lingered close to Viktor’s mouth, your neck stretching slightly as though he were, indeed, telling you a quiet joke meant only for you to hear.

“Or,” Jayce countered, raising an eyebrow, “it’s loud in here, and he’s favouring the good leg.”

“Quiet, unbeliever,” Hale dismissed him with a dramatic wave of his hand. “Now, pay attention. Look at his hand. It’s hovering over her, see? He touches her every so often—nothing dramatic, just enough to remind her he’s there.”

The group watched as Viktor’s hand brushed your arm, subtle but deliberate, before retreating again.

“And now,” Hale continued, lowering his voice for effect, “he’s going to make her look. Watch how he gestures toward the bar—something he said, no doubt very clever—and there it is. She’s looking at his hand.” Your gaze flicked down to Viktor’s hand as he emphasized his point, your expression a mix of amusement and concentration.

“Now, notice her,” Hale said, leaning forward conspiratorially. “She’s holding back, but she’s doing that thing she does when she likes someone. See how she doesn’t look directly at him when he talks? Instead, she leans toward him, like she’s pulled by a magnet.”

Right on cue, you tilted your head slightly toward Viktor, though your eyes remained fixed elsewhere.

“And now,” Hale declared with a triumphant grin, “he’ll look away, and she’ll steal a glance. Ah! There it is.” He pointed as your gaze darted to Viktor’s face the moment his attention shifted elsewhere.

“And what is she looking at, you ask?” Hale continued, his tone dripping with faux gravity. “She’s checking if he’s comfortable with her. Or, in Viktor’s case, if he’s in pain. Watch her eyes.”

Sure enough, your gaze swept over Viktor’s posture, subtly assessing the way his body shifted against the cane.

“And now, for the dramatic finale,” Hale announced, holding up a hand as if to quiet an invisible audience. “He will pass her the first cup of coffee, and she will take it from his hand. That way, they’ll touch—skin on skin. And…”

The group collectively held their breath, eyes fixed on the bar. Viktor handed you a cup, your fingers brushing briefly.

“She’ll look at him and make a joke,” Hale continued confidently, “and—yes, there it is.”

You said something with a wry smile, your eyes glinting, and Viktor’s laugh followed—a soft, genuine sound that made his shoulders relax.

“And now,” Hale finished with a flourish, “he’s shoving four sugar packets into his coffee while she’s not looking. I guess that’s just Viktor being gross.”

Sue stifled a laugh, Mel smirked, and Jayce shook his head in disbelief.

“And this,” Hale said, leaning back triumphantly, “ladies, gentlemen, and beautiful creatures, is the cautious love that we are lucky enough to witness blooming before our very eyes.”

“With your voiceover, it feels like spying on someone having sex, Hale,” Mel quipped, arching an eyebrow.

“Exciting, isn’t it?” Hale replied, completely unfazed, a satisfied grin spreading across his face. Reading people was his superpower, and he had seen through Viktor the first day they all met in the very pub that was now their place of refuge. You, he knew by heart.

“Man, you are frightening,” Jayce whispered loudly. “Watching this careful study, well… maybe you’re right, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up,” he added, glancing toward the bar. He hurriedly returned to his notes, mindful that you and Viktor would be back any second and shouldn’t know what had just transpired. Feeling the weight of three questioning stares, he sighed and elaborated, “Viktor does more of… guest performances rather than full seasons, if you catch my meaning.”

“Oh, let him try a guest performance with my darling girl, and I will shove his cane up his—” Hale’s expression shifted instantly from threatening to sickeningly sweet as he noticed you eyeing him from the distance. “Did you get what your heart desired, my love?”

“I suppose. What are you guys talking about?” you asked, your gaze sweeping suspiciously over the group before landing briefly on Viktor. You sent him a silent question, but he didn’t seem to notice, too absorbed in his meticulous effort to sweeten his coffee.

“Nothing… Renaissance theatre history… lip gloss,” came a broken chorus of voices in response.

Your eyebrows shot even higher on your forehead. “Uh… as you wish, weirdos,” you dismissed, focusing on your sandwich instead.

The group fell into a brief silence, the kind that crackled with unspoken thoughts, pens scribbling, papers being shuffled around. Jayce kept glancing toward Viktor one time too many, his eyebrows furrowing as if he were trying to decode something. Viktor’s patience snapped first.

“What?” Viktor asked, irritation colouring his tone. “Do I have something on my face?”

Jayce blinked, startled. “Huh? No, just… never mind,” he muttered, hurriedly returning to his notes. Was it possible for his friend to have a thing with you and never mention it?

Before the awkward moment could deepen, Sue suddenly jolted upright as if struck by lightning. “Shit! I need to pack!” she exclaimed, shoving her notebook into her bag with alarming speed. She leaned over to you, kissed your forehead dramatically, and declared, “Don’t do anything stupid while I’m away.”

You rolled your eyes, chewing on your sandwich. “No promises.”

Sue hesitated for a split second, her gaze flickering briefly toward Viktor before snapping back to you. “Or do,” she added with a sly grin, winking.

You snorted, shaking your head. “Have a nice weekend, Sue.”

“You too!” Sue called over her shoulder, already halfway out the door.

Once she was gone, Jayce tilted his head curiously. “Where’s she off to?”

You swallowed your bite and shrugged. “Spending the weekend with her dad. Family bonding time, you know how it is.”

Viktor, who had been stirring his coffee in a slow, thoughtful rhythm, glanced at you. “So, you are alone for the entire weekend?”

You met his gaze, an eyebrow arching. “That’s right. Why? Got something in mind?”

Viktor’s lips curved into the faintest hint of a smirk, but all he said was, “Maybe.”

You tilted your head, your eyes narrowing playfully. “Careful, Viktor. As a wise man once said, too much love can kill you.”

Jayce, who had been sipping his drink, choked on a laugh, sputtering as he tried to regain his composure. Viktor’s brows knitted together in confusion for a moment. He rested his chin on his hand, mulling it over until realization dawned. He straightened, looking at you with mild disbelief.

“Wait,” he said slowly, his voice laced with both amusement and incredulity. “Did you just quote Meatloaf at me?”

You grinned wickedly, your eyes glinting with mischief. “What can I say? I have range.”

Jayce laughed again, shaking his head. “I can’t decide if that’s impressive or completely unhinged.”

“Unhinged,” Viktor replied flatly, though the corners of his mouth twitched in betrayal of a suppressed smile.

You raised your sandwich in a mock toast. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“Of course you would,” Viktor muttered, taking a long sip of his now overly sweetened coffee.

But as if taking your cautionary tale seriously, Viktor didn’t reach out to you at all on Friday evening or Saturday. You had half-expected a witty text or some excuse to drop by, but your phone remained stubbornly silent.

You told yourself you didn’t care. If Viktor wanted to brood or busy himself with his mysterious projects, that was his problem, not yours. You weren’t going to waste your weekend waiting for him to decide otherwise. So, when you overheard someone in the dorm hall mentioning a party on the third floor that evening, you figured it was better than wallowing in boredom.

#viktor arcane #viktor x reader #viktor fanfic #viktor x reader smut #viktor x f!reader #arcane #viktor smut #arcane fanfic #my writing #ao3 #ao3 fanfic #viktor x oc #viktor nation #the game of teaching body

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scoonsalicious · 8 months ago

Text

9.1 Lily

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

Summary: Lily McIntyre, trainer for new SHIELD recruits at the Avengers Tower, has been in love with her best friend, Bucky Barnes, from the moment she met him. She's been content with her role of the #1 girl in Bucky's life, even if it means she has to sabotage a romantic relationship or two. It'll be worth it when he realizes that they're meant for each other, right? There's just one small problem: Lily McIntire never expected Bucky Barnes to fall for You.

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language,

Word Count: 1.8k

Previously On...: You spent a lovely day at the Compound with Bucky, even if he did tell you he thinks you should stop having sex so you can focus on getting to know one another better.

A/N: In the interest of saving my arm, I'm going to move to a temporary every other day posting schedule. So, for the time being, updates will be Mon/Wed/Fri/Sun/Tue/Thus/Sat etc, at least until I am fully better.

If you ever feel so inclined to support my work, hop on over to buy me a coffee; it's much appreciated! <3

NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates

Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!

Lily paced in the empty common room as she waited for Bucky to get back to the Compound from wherever he’d been when she’d texted him. She was furious. She was more than furious. She was enraged. After all the work she’d put into preparing their ‘friend’ date, he had the gall to stand her up, and not let her know until fifteen minutes after he was supposed to pick her up! What kind of a friend did something like that?

And then! When one of her recruits had come in after lunch, telling everyone who would listen how he’d seen Bucky Barnes ride off the compound grounds on his motorcycle with “a hot piece of ass” on the bike behind him, and that the “piece of ass” was wearing one of Bucky’s Henleys? How the fuck was she supposed to take that, if not a blatant slap to the face of their relationship? It was all her recruits could talk about for the next twenty minutes, gossiping like a bunch of little old ladies with absolutely nothing better to do with their time.

Until Lily made them run ten miles.

She couldn’t believe he was doing this to her. Risking their four years of friendship.

And all for what? Some random slag? Was he really that desperate to get his dick wet? Fuck, she’d be more than willing to help him out with that if he’d just ask her. Why was he being so difficult?

She stopped mid-turn when she heard the sound of the elevator doors opening. Spinning on her heel, she watched as Bucky exited and made his way slowly into the common room, looking like a man about to walk into his execution. Good, she thought. Let him feel ashamed for humiliating me like that.

“Hey, Lil,” he said when he’d finally reached her.

“Don’t you ‘hey, Lil’ me,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest defensively. “What you did last night was really hurtful, James”

“I said I was sorry, Lil,” he protested with a sigh, hands thrust deep into his pockets. “I didn’t mean to bail on you– it’s just… she was willing to give me another chance after I fucked it up yesterday morning. I didn’t want to risk blowing it.”

Lily scoffed. “So, you decided that impressing some random hookup was more important than keeping plans you made with your best friend of the last four years?”

“She’s not a random hookup, Lil,” Bucky said, his voice rising slightly. “I told you– I really like this one. I want this to work out between us.”

Lily rolled her eyes. “So, what? Her vagina is so magic you’re gonna let it turn you into a shitty friend?”

Bucky seemed taken aback by that, and Lily began pacing again. “Lil?” He cleared his throat, the sound stopping her in her tracks. “Is the reason you’re so bothered by this because… because you have feelings for me?”

Lily could feel all the blood drain from her face, and she was grateful not to be facing him because she knew she’d look as white as a ghost and completely give herself away.

“It’s okay if you do,” Bucky said into her silence. “I’d never invalidate your feelings, but you have to know that I don–”

“Ego trip much, Jamie?” Lily asked, turning around and giving the cheeriest fake laugh she could muster at a time like this. “You’re my best friend. I mean, I love you, but only as a friend. Don’t be ridiculous.”

She watched in dismay as a weight seemed to be visibly lifted off of Bucky’s shoulders as he leaned against one of the couches; his entire demeanor seeming lighter at her denial, and she was so glad she hadn’t been honest with him. If she had confessed how she felt and he had outright rejected her… Well, she didn’t know what she would do, but she knew it wouldn’t be pretty.

“Why would you even ask me such a thing?” she prodded, attempting to hide the desperation in her voice to know how the seed had been planted. “Honestly, how did that idea even get into your head?”

Bucky shrugged. “You just never seem to like any of the girls I date,” he said. “I thought that might’ve been why.”

Lily scoffed. “I can’t help it that your taste in women is terrible, Jamie,” she said, and felt a twinge of satisfaction when he flinched at her words. “And if I’m not mistaken, I’ve yet to be wrong about a single one of them in the end, no matter how great they seemed at the beginning. But that doesn’t mean that I want to be with you.”

She was lying to him through her teeth, and she knew that she should feel bad about it, but right now, nothing seemed more imperative than to protect herself from his rejection.

“I don’t care how much you like this girl, Jamie,” she went on. “It was still an asshole move to leave me hanging so that you could go fuck some slut you barely know.”

“Hey,” he said, rising to his full height and using a tone of voice that he had never used on her before. An angry tone. “I admit, taking off like that and not giving you more warning was not my finest moment, and I am sorry that I hurt your feelings, I really am. But she is not a slut, and I won’t let you call her that.”

Lily blinked at him for a few beats, her mouth hanging open in shock. He had never, not once in the entire four years of their friendship, raised his voice in anger toward her before. It was a little frightening.

And kind of hot.

“Okay,” she said with a sigh, trying to make her voice sound contrite while hoping for maximum pity at the same time. “I’m sorry. Look, I don’t want to fight with you. It just made me feel like you didn’t care about me. Like I don’t matter to you the second something better comes along.”

Bucky walked over to her and put a hand on her shoulder. “Lil,” he said, giving it a gentle squeeze, “you know that’s not true. You’re one of the most important people in my life. I messed up, and I’m sorry. Let me make it up to you.”

“I feel like you’ve been saying that to me a lot lately, Jamie,” she said, and was rewarded when she saw him look away from her in shame. She’d cut him a little bit of slack. “How do you plan on making it up to me this time?” she asked with a smile.

Bucky’s entire face lit up, and Lily’s breath hitched. God, but he was beautiful when he smiled at her like that. “I was actually thinking,” he began, moving around the room as he grew excited, “that since I got you so pissed off, what better to get it out of your system than to go destroy some shit at The WarZone?”

Lily just stared at him, shocked. “That’s the place owned by that bitch Natasha invited to the bar on Friday, isn’t it?”

Bucky slowly nodded. “Uh, yeah… Major… Her name’s Major.”

Lily scoffed and crossed her arms over her chest. “Seriously, Bucky? After the way she treated me that night? You can’t honestly expect me to patronize her establishment after the way she humiliated me in front of all of our friends!?”

Bucky frowned at her, and Lily felt something in her stomach twist at his expression. “She didn’t embarrass you, Lil,” he said. “She was just responding to something you said to her first.”

“Well, I don’t care if that’s how you see it,” Lily said defensively. “She was still a nasty bitch to me. I don’t want to have anything to do with her, and I’m sure as shit not going to hang out with you in the business she runs.”

Bucky sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Lil,” he said, as though it were paining him, “it’s really important to me that you make an effort to get along with Major.”

Lily rolled her eyes. “Jamie, how could it be that important for me to get along with a random girl you just met the other—” The realization crashed over her like a ton of bricks. “Oh,” was all she could say.

Bucky blushed and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. “Yeah,” he said almost bashfully. “Major’s the girl I’ve been talking about, Lil. She’s the one I went to see last night.”

Lily’s stomach soured at the realization that Bucky had been sneaking around, lying to her these last few days, in order to go see that fucking bitch. “I—” she began. “You had sex with her Friday night, after you brought her home, didn’t you?”

Bucky nodded, not meeting her eye. He had lied to her face, again.

“I honestly can’t believe you’d put some slut you just met over your best friend, Jamie. That makes this whole thing even worse!”

“She is not a slut, Lily,” Bucky said, his voice clipped in renewed anger. “Don’t you dare call her that!”

“Well, what do you call a girl who sleeps with a guy she’s only known for a couple of hours? Would you prefer ‘tramp,’ or ‘floozy’? Something more in line with your times?”

“I had sex with her after only knowing her for a couple of hours,” Bucky said. “So, I guess you think I’m a slut, too.”

Lily’s eyes went wide at the implication of her words. “Of… of course not, Bucky. I would never insinuate–”

“There’s no difference between what she and I did, because we did it together,” he said. “So, either were both sluts, or neither one of us are.”

This conversation was getting horribly out of Lily’s control. “Look,” she said eventually, trying to get things back on track. If she had any hope of surviving this, she was going to have drastically change her tactics. “I don’t even actually care if you slept with her after only knowing her a few hours.” Oh, but she did, she reminded herself. “I’m pissed because ever since you’ve met this girl, it feels like you’ve done nothing but lie to me and toss me aside. That’s not the Jamie I know, and frankly, your behavior is concerning me.”

Bucky’s face softened, his anger dissipating at her words. “You’re right, Lil. I’ve been a dick, and I promise you, the lying is done. And I’m gonna be more considerate when it comes to communicating with you if I have to cancel plans,” he said.

Lily’s jaw twitched at his choice of words. Not ‘I won’t cancel on you again,’ or even ‘I won’t let this new girl come between us.’ Just a veiled threat that he would bail on her for Major, again and again. She was going to have to play this game very, very carefully if she had any hope of actually breaking them up. That meant, for now, keeping him on her side.

“Thank you, Jamie,” she said, plastering on a hundred watt smile. “You don’t know what that means to me.”

<- Previous Part / Next Part ->

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x you #bucky x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfiction #james bucky buchanan barnes #james buchanan barnes #mcu bucky barnes #james barnes

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ladykailitha · 1 month ago

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King of the Day!

Hello and welcome to my Christmas AUvent Calendar! Every day from now until the 24th I will be posting a ficlet that is 500-1500 from an AU I've done over the years.

All stories will be marked with the tag #12 aus of christmas so you can follow along as I will only be tagging my permanent list for this (it would get too confusing otherwise).

The last one on our list is: Steve is Tattoo Artist verse. You can read the story here. All links will be to the first chapter, but the chapter itself will have links to the rest of the story.

The title comes from the European tradition of if the [insert object here] in the cake you were king for the day (I learned about it in my French three decades ago so if I got wrong sorry!).

Day 1 Day 2 Day 3 Day 4 Day 5 Day 6 Day 7 Day 8 Day 9 Day 10 Day 11

Steve was facing the dilemma of topping Eddie’s Christmas from last year. Where his band Corroded Coffin got their first gold record, which had gone platinum earlier this year. But if everything went right and Gareth didn’t forget his present to Eddie then he might just win.

But as it was right at that moment it was a disaster.

“What do you mean you lost my order?” Steve asked through gritted teeth. “I called confirmed it only yesterday and every week for the last three weeks!”

He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Are you sure you’re spelling ‘Buckley’ correctly? It’s B-U-C-K-L-E-Y. Yes with an E. Thank you!”

“No ma’am, I’m not saying that you’re dumb or anything of the sort,” he continued dryly. “I just wanted to make sure it was going to be here on time. It’s already out for delivery. Thank you!”

He set the receiver gently in its cradle and then picked it back up again. Once he heard the dial tone he slammed it several times for good measure.

“You do know that I’ve done this for the last five years,” Robin snarked from the entrance to tattoo shop, “as my job. I don’t know why you won’t let me do it for this.” She walked into the shop and leaned against the counter. “You’re just stressing yourself out over nothing.”

Steve laid his head on the desk with a sigh, letting the cool surface calm his rage. “I just wanted to make tonight special.”

She scooped up his hands in hers. “It will be special because he loves you. Now, let’s see it.”

He reached into his pocket and handed her a small red velvet box. She opened it and smiled fondly. It was perfect. It was white gold with ruby in the middle and framed by four black spinel gemstones, two large close to the ruby and two smaller stones on the outside.

Then she slipped it into her pocket. “I’ll just hold on to this for safe keeping. So what is the other thing you’re getting Eddie for Christmas? Because I know this is for after the gift giving.”

“Gareth is bringing it,” Steve said with a sigh. “Eddie is like a little kid looking for presents all the time and knows all my hiding spots.”

Robin laughed, because yeah. Steve’s boyfriend was like a kid when it came with presents, something Wayne had to warn him for when his birthday came up.

“I’ve been texting him nonstop reminding him to bring it,” he continued and then he handed her his phone. “Then he sent me this.”

It was a picture of Gareth in his car, a stack of presents in the passenger seat, and he’s giving the camera the middle finger. The caption read underneath, “I’ve got it! Quit your bitching!”

“Am I supposed to guess which one is yours to Eddie?” she asked rolling her eyes as she handed it back to him.

Steve rolled his eyes and jerk his head forward, holding his hands out like it was obvious. “Like the one wrapped differently then all the others?”

“Oh.”

The party was in full swing. Everyone was having fun, the booze was flowing, the food flying off the table and into happy mouths.

“I can’t believe you got me the entire new edition of the D&D manuals,” Eddie huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. “Like how am I supposed to compete with that?”

Steve kissed his cheek. “It’s not a competition, love. Despite what you and Gareth think.”

“Bah!” Eddie said. Then he got shy. “You did like your present, right?”

Steve tilted his to the side. Eddie had gotten him a custom apron that said, “King of this Castle” for him to wear while he was tattooing. “Of course I did. I loved it, baby. Chrissy is already trying to convince Robin and Vickie to get her and Argyle similar ones.”

Eddie shoved his hair in front of his face. “Yeah?”

Steve gently took the strand from him and tucked it behind his ear. “Yeah, sunshine. I promise.”

Robin gave him a pat on his shoulder as she passed by them.

It was time.

He took a deep breath and then grabbed his hand. “There’s one more present for you.”

Eddie cocked his head to the side and then his eyes went wide. “Oh!”

“Last year when I gave you my grandfather’s ring,” Steve said, cupping Eddie’s cheek, “I promised that I would get you a ring that was all your own.” He lifted his left hand. “There is only room for one more.” He tapped the ring finger.

“Stevie...” he breathed.

Suddenly he was aware that everyone was watching them as Steve got down on one knee.

“Would you do the honor of being my husband?” He pulled out the red velvet box Robin had slipped him when she passed.

Eddie held his hands mouth, too overjoyed to speak and nodded. Steve slipped the ring on his finger. It fit perfectly and perfectly fit the rest of Eddie’s rings as Steve intended.

“I love you.”

Eddie pulled him to his feet and kissed him senseless. “Merry Christmas, Stevie.”

A cheer went up as Steve blushed and pressed their foreheads together. “Merry Christmas, Eds.”

“Does this make me the royal consort?” Eddie asked with a grin.

Steve threw his head back and laughed. He loved this man so deeply. “Yeah, babe. You absolute drama queen!”

Everyone laughed.

Tag List: CLOSED

1- @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog @sadisticaltarts @dolphincliffs

2- @gregre369 @a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @cryptid-system @kultiras

3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog

4- @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji @dreamercec @blondie1006

5- @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @genderless-spoon @fearieshadow @thesecondfate

6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman

7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth

8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss

#my writing #stranger things #steddie #ladykailtiha writes #the 12 aus of christmas

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clarkeyhill · 2 months ago

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☁️Invisible| George Clarke

Summary: you have a crush on George, but you don't believe you're good enough for him, little do you know you're just his type.

It wasn't unusual that you were the last person someone picked, whether it be for a teams in games or dates; you were the black sheep. You were outgoing, a bubbly person but was shy at the same time. You'd recently joined content creating and started on TikTok, expanding your taste palette for new ideas you came across a guy name George, he posted funny skits and impression videos, although you weren't the type to do those things, his content inspired you to create something new. You decide to follow him.

You post a haul of your shopping trip to b&m, showing your followers the new things and dupes along the way, you were an eye for bargains and anything similar to the expensive price tags. Racking just over 70,000 followers in just a short few months you were invited to a pr event with White Fox. A brand that you'd never personally purchased from but you did love their products, you accepted through your management and agreed to vlog/promote the brand at the event.

You were so excited, your first Pr opportunity. Tears form in your eyes from joy as you make a video "hey guys i have some exciting news! I've just been invited to my first pr event with White Fox, I'm going to vlog my whole experience and break it down for you guys along the way, I'm so grateful to be able to have these opportunities thanks to you guys watching!" You say with beams of happiness as you sign off the video and upload it.The event was 3 days away so you had time to prepare. You placed your phone on charge whilst you did the laundry, a time you like to take off social media and block out the outside world, although it's your job.

After your small detox you open up your phone, lots of TikTok notifications flooding through with congratulations when two stood out to you.

@georgeclarkeey liked your video

@georgeclarkeey started following you

Your eyes widened in shock, a creator you took inspiration from had followed you, you wasn't sure why all your content being girly related but non the less you were buzzing. You responded to a few comments on your video for a while as you sipped on an iced coffee, when a message popped on your phone.

@georgeclarkeey: "hey sorry for the random message, I saw your video about your pr event and I just wanted to firstly congratulate you on it, you're doing really well! Also I am aswell invited to the event, wonder if you'd like to meet there? Don't want it to come across weird haha"

Your mouth ran dry, a sense of shock and excitement overboard your body, how could someone like George Clarke want to meet me you thought, you were never people like George's cup of tea, the lonely kid in school who'd eat alone and now a big creator asks to meet you. You hesitate to reply incase you make a fool of yourself, strumming the confidence to reply.

You: hi! aw thanks for that, I appreciate it! It's been a shock to the system to say the least haha, I'd love to meet up, I'd know nobody there apart from my management so you'd do me a solid!"

You smile into your phone like a schoolgirl with her first crush, George was undeniable attractive he had a big girl following and everyone went crazy for him. You were quite fond of him yourself to say the least. @georgeclarkeey: "no problem at all, it's always a shock when you get your first but honestly the only way from here is up, would you like to meet at the event or beforehand? A coffee or something?"

You: "a coffee sounds great, let me know where and I'll be there, thanks for being so kind"

@georgeclarkeey: "perfect! I'll text you a coffee shop closer to the event so we won't have far to walk afterwards also it's my pleasure! Nice to see some other varieties of content surfacing, your contents lovely to watch"

Shut the front door. THE George Clarke telling you your contents lovely to watch? You're kidding. The world seems fake right now, so many emotions rushing through you.

You: "Thankyou George, it means a lot, I've took a lot of inspiration from your videos to try and open my confidence up a little, so you could say your contents helped me in ways to boost my career"

You continue to chat, getting to know eachother.

Day of the White fox Event

Your nerves were setting in, your first event meeting new people and also meeting up with George. You opted for a some casual clothes, baggy mom jeans and a white crop top with a flannel shirt over the top. Your makeup as basic as normal, a touch of brow gel, a pop of mascara and some skin tint. Nothing major. You make your way into London to meet George, he'd text you the address beforehand, a 2 second walk from the venue. Your hair cascaded over your shoulders as the London breeze hit your skin, a mix of crisp and warm air. Just as you get to the coffee shop your stomach sinks, what if he doesn't like me? Thinks I'm weird? The battles of your overthinking brain looms and looms as you step in, there he was, blue eyed and handsome.

His eyes shoot up as you walk through the door, a warm smile makes it way over his face "hey, glad you could make it" he says arising from his seat to hug you, a mixture of mint and aftershave flooded your nostrils as you embraced him for a hug "I wouldn't have missed it for the world, how are you?" You reply sitting down "ah I'm good, busy but good, yourself?" He replies "same really, not so much as busy as you probably but yeah, I'm excited" you smile, his gaze wandering down to your lips as you spoke as shivers tingle down your spine. You talk over coffee for a while before heading to the venue.

"You ready?" He says with a warm smile opening the door for you "I think so" you chuckle nervously "you'll be fine, don't worry I'm here if you need anything" he says with a reassuring tone which wrapped around you like a warm blanket of safety. You give your names to the people at the desk and collect your lanyards, you pull out your phone to introduce your video.

"Hi guys, I've just arrived and the nerves are kicking in, I'll try to film as much as I can for you all, trying to sink into the reality of it all along the way and make new friends which I seem to have-" you were interrupted by George poking his head in "she's already made one friend, well should I say I practically befriended her" he chuckles placing a hand on your shoulder as he walks to grab a drink. You put your phone away, saving the footage, George Clarke in your video would be a big shock to your fanbase for sure.

The night goes on and you meet new creators, have interviews with some labels and tell everyone on how you got into influencing, the night couldn't have gone much better; George was there to reassure you when you felt nervous and just guide you through the whole experience which you were thankful for. There was an after party, but you opted not to go.

"Leaving so soon?" George asking raising a brow, "yeah sorry, parties aren't really my thing, Thankyou for tonight George I appreciate it a lot" you say smiling "we could go grab a drink elsewhere if you wanted, just me and you?" He says, you were taken a back by his response that he wanted to leave the event, to be with you, in a strange turn of events you'd never imagine something like this would happen, you weren't up to beauty standards nor were you a model, why did he want to go for a drink with you? "You don't have to, I wouldn't pull you away from your friends" you reply "you're not, you're my friend and I want to have a drink with you" his sweet smile returns, a gaze of sincerity plastered over him like a genuine interest in you loomed inside him "okay, maybe just a quiet one" you say as he nodded, you said bye to everyone and left, scoping out a bar to indulge in.

You chatted for a while at the bar, like you'd known eachother a life time and not just a few days, you got on like a house on fire, taking in eachothers interests. It's like no matter what you said, did or how you acted George would always match your energy and it comforted you. After a while you call it a night, it was getting late. You walk out the bar as you book an Uber home

"I've really enjoyed today, Thankyou" you say with a soft smile "me too, normally I hate pr just because of the social interaction, but you've made it easy to bare" he says laughing "well atleast I could be of some use" you retort, silence looms over you as George stares at you for a little longer than normal "can I kiss you?" He says nervously, your eyes widen "really?" You say shocked "is that okay?" He says "yeah-just nobody's ever wanted to kiss me" you say nervously "why not, you're really pretty, funny and easy to get a long with" he says brushing his hand against yours, with a soft smile as he cups your chin and places a soft kiss onto your lips, a magnetic shock goes through you like it was something you had longed for a while, a connection that felt so right. You pulled away and stared at eachother for a minute as you sink in the reality of what had just happened. You exchange numbers and arrange to meet up again, turns out your worrying was for nothing, you were just his type.

🫶🏻

#george clarkey #youtube #george clarke #british youtubers #arthur hill

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so-long-soldier-writes · 3 months ago

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Don't Worry Today, Face It Tomorrow

kai parker x reader

summary: kai's been lonely enough in his life to sense something's off with you. tonight was a good time to trust his intuition.

tags: mental health issues, depression, loneliness, late night conversations, suicidal thoughts, emotional hurt / comfort

word count: 2.6k

a/n: this is a fic i kind of wrote for myself but still want to share. i somewhat vaguely made the reader's problems my problems, because i needed to talk them out, but struggle to do that with people, so i do it through my writing. i wrote this a little while ago but have been hesitant to post it bc i didn't want to worry my readers by posting so many sui/sh related fics, but as explained in the ending note of this fic on ao3, i'm entering a new stage in my life where i hope i can start writing gentler & more lighthearted & fun fics again. i've been in a dark place these last couple months and have completely lost myself as a person, but i'm actively trying to make my life one where i'm not afraid to be present. i saw a quote recently that said, "...if hope is out of reach, try curiosity instead," and so that's about where i am rn. but anyway, i hope, despite it's heaviness, you guys like this, or maybe, it helps you feel less alone. <3

“Thought I’d find you here.”

You roll your eyes at the familiar voice. Of course he’d come to disturb your peace.

“What do you want?”

He doesn’t answer immediately. The sound of shuffling indicates he’s coming closer. “Just checking on you.”

“I don’t need checking on. I didn’t the last time, nor the time before that, and certainly not this time. Can’t you catch the hint that I want to be left alone?”

“See that’s the thing… the hints are all there, I’m just choosing not to leave you alone.”

Fully irritated now, you shift your whole body to face Kai. Annoyingly, he leans against the restaurant’s chimney, unbothered by the heat that must be emanating from it. His arms are crossed over his chest, but his usual smirk is replaced with a somber look.

“Why?”

“Because…” He isn’t looking at you. In fact, he seems to look right through you, perhaps into some far off world or a deep void that threatens to swallow you whole. “...You look like someone who shouldn’t be alone right now.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’ve climbed up here five times in the last two weeks. You’ve been acting distant. You don’t eat, I doubt you sleep. Everyone’s worried about you, and they have every right to be.”

“I’m fine,” you lie. “Maybe I just like it up here. I can see the whole town. I’m in it, without being in it. It’s peaceful.”

If that was supposed to comfort the young witch, it didn’t. He tilts his head against the brick. “And what about the rest? Are they right to worry about you? Are these new habits you’ve seem to have adopted secretly a cry for help?”

You narrow your eyes. “Of course not, that’s insane. I told you, I’m fine.” Before he can ask anything else, you continue. “And what’s it to you? Why do you care? If they’re so worried, why don’t they come and bother me instead?”

“Because they haven’t followed you to the extent I’ve followed you.”

“Comforting.”

“They see you at lunch, not talking, not eating, not laughing. And then they see you go home, usually early, and not come out for days. They acknowledge the fact you haven’t answered their texts in days, and they know you’re not feeling well, but they’ve barely scratched the surface.” He pauses. “I’ve been studying you. I see the dullness in your eyes, and I can tell apart a real laugh from a fake one. I’ve begun to notice that right before you’re about to make up an excuse to go home, you tap your nails on the edge of the table. You scan the restaurant, making sure the coast is clear, so that you can make a sure shot to the door without being interrupted.” You open your mouth to speak, disturbed by the detail, but Kai interrupts. “I’m a sociopath. I notice things in a person’s behavior that are missed by most.”

“And why do you think all these ‘things’ are reasons to have you so worried? Maybe I’m just tired of socializing.”

“Maybe. But I’ve been alone for a long time and I know how it feels. How it feels to be hopeless, and anxious, and exhausted, in a way that goes beyond needing a couple more hours of sleep. I might not’ve been under the same circumstances, but I remember searching for the nearest, tallest building several times when I was locked in that prison world. Let me tell you, the view is nice, but when you finally get the courage to walk up to the edge, the fall is not.”

Your eyes had dropped back down the roof’s floor, but they snap back up to him quickly. His words make your heart race with sudden anxiety. When you try to open your mouth to respond, nothing comes out. It takes a moment to recover.

“How many times did you try?” Invasive, but he’s sharing, so you ask anyway.

“Truth be told,” he surprisingly answers, “I lost count.” He inches closer to you, but you don’t move away. “I couldn’t die in there, but that never stopped me from trying.”

“Until Damon and Bonnie got there.”

“Yes, but I was alone for eighteen years until they did.” He sits beside you now. “Maybe you can see why I was so determined to get out.”

“I could see it before,” you admit.

You know most of Kai’s background. You know he had a big family, most of which are dead now. You know he has been in and out of prison worlds for most of his young life. You know his time spent in those other worlds was deserved; he wasn’t just a sociopath, but a serial killer, as well. Only recently did he finally stop hurting people, afraid of ending up in another one. It was a deal he made with the brothers and Bonnie.

Kai is less afraid of death than being alone. Hell would be a cakewalk compared to the prison worlds.

“My father ensured I couldn’t die so that I wouldn’t be able to take the easy way out. And then again, in 1903, the heretics could only dessicate; they couldn’t die, either. Guess my ancestors have some deep-rooted fascination with eternal suffering. The twin merge is a curse. You either die or kill your sibling before you’re old enough to rent a car. Then, if you live, you have to marry and watch your kids do the same. And if you die before you have merge-able kids, whoops, the death of the coven is on you. Like, imagine you get hit by a car and die, and so does the whole three hundred year old coven. That’s embarrassing. Imagine explaining that to the ancestors in hell.”

You snort and let out a laugh.

“Obviously, I don’t care about my coven, and I only wanted to be the leader so I could prove that I could, but it does suck that we’re all nonconsensually born into this life and can’t get out of it. It would be easier if we didn’t hate each other so much, and that instead of life being one big game of dog-eat-dog, we could come together and be like, ‘Hey! This sucks! Can we try to figure out which ancestral bitch cursed us and maybe reverse that? We’re supposed to be witches, right?’”

You laugh more now. A genuine laugh, amused by Kai Parker’s unusual bareness and honesty. Never had you had such a sincere conversation with him. Frankly, you didn’t know he was capable of opening up as much as he is now. It’s nice. It’s the most meaningful conversation you’ve had recently, and if you’re honest with yourself, it’s healing.

Not only do you know Kai’s background, you know his loneliness. Of course, you’ve never been in his shoes exactly, but you know what it’s like to feel helpless. Sometimes your parents teach you about pain before anyone else has the chance. Sometimes your friends break your heart the hardest. Sometimes it feels like there’s a target on your back and everyone’s carrying arrows.

You don’t need to experience the same trauma to relate to someone, you just need a little bit of courage to speak up about it. The right people will listen. Those who understand.

“I said before that I understand why you were willing to hurt Bonnie and Damon to get out,” you say. “I stand by that still.”

“You do?”

“I met your father once. I was friends with Liv before she skipped town, and he came to her dorm when I was there. He was cold.” You pause, rubbing your arms as a chill runs through your body. Whether it’s the cool night breeze or the memory, you’re not sure. “He smiled, and he made a joke, but his posture was rigid and his eyes were dark. It was like looking into the face of a snake that could strike at any moment. I was afraid to look away, yet afraid to look right at him.”

“He was never a warm person. He loved his wife, and did love my siblings, I think, but coven always came before family. He would betray even those closest to him in a second if asked. I was always told it was complicated for him, but it’s pretty simple. He never hesitated. It was obvious. There was no right vs wrong war in his mind. Guess it makes him a good leader, though. Maybe.”

“Not a good leader,” you argue, “but a dedicated one.” Kai seems to ponder that. “My family’s the opposite: they are complicated. They say one thing, but expect the other. Everything is a guessing game. You’re never quite sure what they want from you, and nothing’s ever good enough. Life feels like a competition: you have to do the most, study the hardest. There’s a thousand boxes to check by the age of twenty-three, and if you don’t complete them, you’re never going to catch up, never going to make them proud.” You’ve ranted a little, spoken somewhat quickly, but Kai follows along with great understanding. “I have a relatively big family, too, and they’re all over the country checking boxes. I live in a small town, with goals only big enough that I won’t feel like a failure if I don’t achieve, and spend every day just trying to stay alive. I’m the biggest disappointment to them and it’s so obvious.”

“Looks like we’re both family disappointments. Do they know about the supernatural?”

“Oh, god no. Their heads would explode.”

Kai laughs. He sees you shiver again and silently unzips his sweater. You startle a bit when he puts it around your shoulders, but then welcome the warmth it brings. It smells like him, so you pull it closer, finding that as a new comfort.

“Thank you.”

“It’s technically Alaric’s-”

You start to pull it off, “ew-”

He stops you with a hand to your back. “But I’ve had it for months.”

“How’d you-?”

“After Damon woke me up when they put me on ice. I’d siphon the magic from Caroline’s mom on two conditions: one, he’d let me merge that night, and two, I could borrow a sweater.”

You chuckle, then let it envelope you again. Kai’s hand leaves your back, taking some, but not all, of the new warmth with him. He stretches out, leaning back on his elbows, and watches you copy the position. Your knees touch gently, though neither of you move. He studies you again, eyeing your face for tension, but finds your lips slightly parted in a relaxed state. You aren’t afraid of him; you aren’t trying to get away.

The only person who isn’t taut as a band around him is Damon, because the vampire’s confidence and strength matches that of the young witch. But here, you’re only human, full of emotion and exhaustion, and alone on a rooftop with none other than the self-proclaimed sociopath himself. If your friends knew, they’d surely be freaking out, and maybe an hour ago, the thought would panic you, too. But now, at this moment in time, you’re completely calm. You’re trusting him.

“So what’s the verdict?” He says out of nowhere, speaking up in the dead of night. The restaurant crowd left some time ago, and the roundabout hasn’t been driven through for less. In the far-off distance, you can hear a dog, but it stops after a few barks.

“What?”

“How are we getting off this roof tonight?” You look over to him with an eyebrow raised. “Are we jumping, or are you gonna climb off with me?”

You ponder the question. Truthfully, you didn’t climb up today with the full intention of climbing back down. If Kai hadn’t followed you up, you, as he put it earlier, may have made it to the edge.

But now, with both of your hearts and histories spilled out in front of you, things are different. Things are harder, because he’s involved. Yet, at the same time, things feel easier. He’s involved. He listened, and he shared his own story. You found common ground and it brought you closer than you’d ever imagined you could be with him. Hell, lately, with anyone. Somewhere, deep in your heart, you feel a bit of hope.

“I’ll be honest,” he starts, “even though I’m out of the prison world, finally leading this dumb coven, and somewhat surviving in this town, I’ve considered it. I thought getting out would be a fix-all, and once I was, I would be okay, but I never imagined that life outside of it could be as lonely as my life was there. My coven still controls me and my family still hates me, and I wanted to get out and prove myself, and live, but now, sometimes,” he struggles for the right words, “I can’t find it in myself to care anymore.” He looks over to you to find you nodding, understanding. “I could die a hundred times over in the prison world with little consequence, but here, death is permanent.”

You offer a smile and a second of silence before agreeing. “Sometimes its permanence is a comfort, but sometimes a hindrance. It's permanent, I’ll never have to carry this weight again. I’ll never be a burden, or a failure, or a disappointment. But at the same time… what if I regret it? What if I’m halfway through the fall, or lying in a hospital bed, and there’s no saving me, but suddenly, I regret it? Or what if we’re conscious in the afterlife, and I miss the body and soul I once had, but gave up before my time was up? It haunts me. I have decision paralysis over dying. I wish I could make up my mind.”

Kai’s never cared much for other people, but in this moment, he knows if you got any closer to the edge, he’d hurl himself forward to pull you back. He sensed something was off about you earlier. You’d been climbing up here for weeks, but this time felt different. Necessary.

“How about this? Climb down with me and we don’t have to make any decisions. Okay?”

“So the decision is to make no decisions?”

“Exactly.” He sits back up, outstretching a hand for you to take. “Let’s go get a coffee or something, and we can worry about it later. And, maybe, tomorrow won’t be so bad, and we can put off that decision making a little bit longer.” Kai manipulates slightly. He knows there is no decision to be made - it’s not a yes or no - but an ultimate decision on when you will take that step closer to the edge. So, if he can distract you day by day, and put off that ultimate decision, he could, with time, pull you from the edge, and eventually, off the roof.

And that is a decision he is willing to make. He’s never cared much for other people, but something about you softens him. His life hasn’t been a fulfilling one. He hasn’t accomplished much, and he’s done little that makes him proud of himself, but you make him want to change. Be better, do more. Even if he only does one good thing, he wants to do it. He wants to save you.

“Okay,” you finally agree, taking his hand. “Coffee sounds nice.”

For the first time of possibly many, he helps guide you back down the stairs, onto the safety of the pavement ground. You keep a hold of his hand all the way to the twenty-four hour diner two blocks down, and the whole time, he can’t stop smiling.

#malachai parker x reader #kai parker x reader #kai parker oneshot #tvd fanfiction #tw mental health #tw sui talk

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gyunglitter · 1 year ago

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i'll always choose you ⚘ choi beomgyu

-for the days being alive seems too hard, you're so happy to have your boyfriend

warnings: none really, just beomgyu being a simp—also, not edited

tags: established relationship, angst, fluff, hurt to comfort

notes: this is the first time i’ve ever finished a story (even if it is just a one shot), but i’m so happy it was this one. i wrote this during a couple of my bad days, so i hope it can help you on yours <3

Beomgyu was just barely getting out of his post-practice shower when he heard his special ringtone he had set just for you go off. You hadn’t talked to each other all day, your last interaction being a quick facetime and good night texts. And while the other members teased him for being clingy, he admitted with his full chest that he missed you. Tiredly wiping a towel through his damp hair, Beomgyu looked at his phone to see a new text message from you.

From: bubs <3

are you busy?

Beomgyu raised an eyebrow at the simple message; typically, you were a pretty energetic texter. It was something he liked about you since he was the same way with people he cared about. Your relationship was still fairly new, but he didn’t think it felt that way with you– the two of you seemed to just get one another, clicking instantly right off the bat and your connection getting deeper with every interaction. So to see a quick text like that surprised him a little bit, but with the thought of getting to facetime you, Beomgyu texted you back immediately.

To: bubs <3

hey, just got out of the shower! practice went a little long today🙃

Beomgyu set his phone down for a moment to throw on some clothes, thinking you would take a bit longer to respond since you typically send longer texts once you knew he was free to talk. However, he was proven wrong when he heard your ringtone go off not even ten seconds later.

From: bubs <3

can i see you?

Beomgyu couldn’t help but feel a little worried as he glanced at the message, throwing his shirt on to get his hands back on his phone. Call him dramatic, but the simple sentence made the worst possible scenarios run through his mind.

To: bubs <3

is everything okay?

what happened?

From: bubs <3

it’s fine

nothing happened

sorry, didn’t mean to worry you

A sigh left Beomgyu’s mouth as he read your last text, confusion and worry only building up even more. Though you assured him nothing had happened, it sure as hell didn’t feel like it. Not only were your texts incredibly bland, but you also weren’t elaborating much of anything, something you supremely hated. Communication was key to you, and he was just now starting to realize why.

To: bubs <3

are you at your dorm right now?

From: bubs <3

yeah

To: bubs <3

okay, did you want any food or anything?? i can drop by the dumpling place or tteokbokki stand on the way to yours!

From: bubs <3

its fine, see you soon?

To: bubs <3

yeah, i’ll be there in 15

just gotta let the guys know!

Beomgyu waited for any other texts from you to come through, but was left with the same screen. No “thanks”, no “stay safe” text, not even one emoji that could possibly express some form of affection. At first he thought you got into an accident of some disastrous sort, spiking his worries. Now, he can feel the worry levels rising again, this time for himself.

What if you wanted to break up with him?

He thought your two a half months of being together had been perfect so far, he hadn’t messed up once. Sure, he teased you about the way you sang his songs sometimes, or the times you needed his help with your perilla leaf, or even when you couldn’t beat Hueningkai in arm wrestling. But he thought it was cute! He thought you liked him annoying you since you dished it back much worse than he did–BUT WHAT IF YOU DIDN’T?

Oh no.

He had to beg you to not leave him, he was not ready to let you go, he hadn’t even taken you to meet Toto yet.

You sat by your front door, resting your head beside the door frame as you waited for Beomgyu to show up. You had no idea how much time had passed since you couldn’t even bring yourself to look at your phone after his last message got through to you. You’d left your phone on your bed and used your remaining energy to trudge your way to the front door. You were tired.

True to your texts to your boyfriend, nothing had happened. And it was okay. You weren’t, but the vague subject of “it” very much was. Sort of.

Nothing inherently bad happened to you: no one spilt their coffee on you, no mean people at work, not even a long red light while driving home. It had just been one of those days where the world felt a little heavier on you. You honestly haven't felt this way in a while. Not since before meeting Beomgyu, who made you smile more than you thought was possible. But alas, mental illness isn’t cured so easily.

You’d gotten home from work less than thirty minutes ago, but you had yet to feel any relief yet. Not knowing what to do and not wanting to be alone, you reached out to the boy who makes you feel lighter effortlessly. You’ve only been together for two and a half months, but they have been the happiest two and a half months you’ve experienced–cheesiness be damned.

Frantic knocks on the front door motivated you to get up for your boyfriend, the tightness in your chest already getting ready to loosen at the thought of Beomgyu standing on the other side.

You could see your boyfriend’s startled face when you opened the door, most likely from the fact that he had barely taken his fist off the wood when you’d whipped it open.

“Y-Y/n! I got here as fast as I could! I know what you’re gonna say, and I just wanna say first that I’m so sorry for teasing you so much–you just make the cutest facial expressions when you get annoyed and I didn’t realize you might have actually cared that I said Hyuka’s arms are bigger than your mom–”

You stared at the boy rambling in front of you, waving one arm in the air as chaotically as his words. However, you also saw in his other hand was a small bunch of flowers–flowers that looked suspiciously like the ones planted in your main lobby’s centerpieces. The poor things still had clumps of dirt on their ends and were staining your boyfriend’s fingers, but he didn’t show any indication of caring as he was still staring at you intently, unshed tears lining his eyes.

This was your boyfriend. Your sweet, loud, silly boyfriend who never failed to make you feel lighter. Effortlessly.

Quickly, you wrapped your arms around Beomgyu’s waist and held him tightly. You felt his arms secure themselves around you automatically. You only realized he’d done it without thinking when he stopped talking and could feel his heart rate suddenly pick up after a few seconds in each other’s arms.

“I don’t wanna break up with you, you loser,” you muttered into his neck and chest.

Beomgyu breathed out. “You don’t?”

“No, I just…really wanted to see you.”

All you could manage was burying yourself even deeper into your boyfriend’s embrace. For the first time today, you felt like you could finally trust someone enough to take hold of the weight from the world and bear it with you. As a result, you slowly leaned against Beomgyu even more and let him really hold you, feeling as if you didn’t have to hold yourself up now that you knew help was here.

Beomgyu tightened his grip on you, when he felt you sigh into his neck. His mind flashed back to the messages you sent. Sure he was relieved that you weren’t trying to leave him, but now he was back to square one: worrying about you.

“Y/n?” He whispered into your hair.

“Hm?”

“I…I really like you, y/n…” Beomgyu admitted quietly. “You said nothing happened, but I know you’re not okay. I don’t know what’s wrong, but please tell me so I can fix it.”

He felt your head burrow even further into him for a second and was about to say…well he doesn’t quite know what to say, he’s just so damn worried about you. But he ended up not needing to say anything. Because you had instead pushed yourself away from his embrace and grabbed his hands, not minding the dirt gathering on your fingers from his pathetic flowers.

“Let’s head inside, Gyu.”

And you led him through, not letting go of his hand once. Not even when he reached to take off his shoes. You instead stuck to him, as if you couldn’t bear to be physically apart from him for one second. He didn’t mind. He felt the same way.

When you both made it to your room, Beomgyu placed the crushed flowers on your bedside table and laid down on your bed. It only took him a second to open his arms for you to snuggle into him once again, shrinking yourself even more than you had before. He massaged the back of your neck under your hair, a habit he randomly developed with you to soothe both you and himself, and felt you release another big sigh.

Though this felt really nice, Beomgyu couldn’t feel at ease. This was completely new territory for the both of you. Sure, you had many quiet moments together. But your silences together were more so ones of peace. This one felt more like…an absence. As if he was missing something and just waiting for you to fill it in again.

“Thanks for the flowers. I’m sorry I worried you so much,” you whispered, your voice so low he wouldn’t have been able to hear had it not been for the lack of space between you. You sounded so, well, small.

And as much as Beomgyu wanted to tell you it was okay, he knew he couldn’t. Because if he said it was, you’d think you could do it again. And he really did not want to go through feeling like this again. Others would call him dramatic, but he calls it his Y/n Intuition. You may be the light in his life, but he knows all about hiding your real feelings behind a smile.

“I just…I don’t think about what I’m saying or doing sometimes when I get…like this…”

He can practically hear the struggle you’re going through as you try to communicate with him.

“What is this, bubs?” Beomgyu asked patiently, prompting you to keep trying.

Taking a breath, you took the time to sort out your thoughts before saying, “Somedays I just wake up…duller I guess.”

“Duller?”

You nodded hesitantly. “Like the colors are fading, my days all become the same, and even though I just woke up I’m so tired. And I just…don’t get the point anymore.”

Beomgyu tried his hardest to not flinch at your confession.

“I’m so tired, Beomgyu, I can’t bring myself to do anything. And I can’t want to do anything either. Just the thought of it….” You shook your head back and forth, as if to erase what you’d just said. “Agh, I hate myself sometimes. I’m sorry, that’s so lazy. I’m not like this most of the time, I promise, Gyu. Some days are just harder than others.”

Beomgyu frowned deeply at your denial to yourself. He didn’t like hearing the things you thought about unconsciously, but even more, he didn’t like the way you talked about yourself.

“Why do you talk about yourself like that?” He asked, hands still.

You raised your head to look up at him. “Like what?”

“‘Lazy’. You’re not lazy, y/n.”

“That’s what being lazy is, dude,” you scoffed, letting out a light laugh.

But Beomgyu shook his head. “That’s not the root of the issue–there’s a difference between being lazy and overwhelmed. It happens to me too, you can’t help that sometimes. But you’re. Not. Lazy, y/n. You just need help.”

He watched as your eyes widened at him, before you frowned and scoffed, mostly aimed toward yourself. “I’m, uh, not very good at asking for help.”

“You did a good job of getting me here,” Beomgyu smiled.

You shook your head at him. “But I wasn’t trying to get you here for help. I…” you sighed out, laying your head back in Beomgyu’s neck. “I just wanted you.”

With a new soft feeling taking over, Beomgyu nearly burst into tears for the second time that night. He felt things in his heart and stomach he had never felt before, and he didn’t want it to ever go away. God, he couldn’t put a proper name to how he felt, but he wanted you too.

“I missed you today, “ he whispered into the quiet room.

“Yeah?” you whispered back.

“Mhm. Practice went long today, but it felt even longer because I couldn’t focus on anything but that goodnight text you sent me last night.”

“It wasn’t anything special, Gyu,” you said, but he could tell that you were blushing, which made him let out a soft chuckle.

“I swear, you have such a way with words, bubs, I think you chose the wrong profession,” he joked lightly, feeling the way your lips curved against his neck. “But it’s not always the words you say that matter to me, it’s the fact that you say anything at all.”

Beomgyu’s hand that had been rubbing the back of your neck moved down to squeeze your waist again.

He said softly, “I know it’s hard for you to see what the point is some days, I feel like that sometimes too. But I just have to remind myself of the things that keep me happy.”

“Like Toto?” you chimed in, a small smile creeping up your lips as Beomgyu snorted at your lame joke to stop your tears from coming.

“I was thinking more about you, but yes, I guess he counts too.”

You gasped playfully, “Wow, some pet owner you are.”

He just shrugged in response. “It was either that or a being a good boyfriend, bubs.”

“Well,” you sighed heavily, “Even though I feel bad for your bird, I have to say I am grateful you chose the second option. I mean, look at these beautiful flowers you got me. They’re so authentic, they still have the dirt from my lobby on them.”

Beomgyu merely smiled, before saying, “It’s not that hard of a decision—I’ll always choose you, bubs.”

He felt a groan reverberate off of his neck from your whining form and tried to stop the laugh from bubbling out of his chest, knowing it would distract you from his point. Meanwhile you were too busy trying to fight off your embarrassment.

“Oh my god, Gyu, you’re so cheesy!” You try and nestle into your boyfriend further to hide from him, but fail as you’re already as close as can be. And with the fact that Beomgyu does not put up with it this time.

“No y/n, I mean it!” Your boyfriend pushed you away gently but firmly to make you see his gaze that was filled with determination and sincerity. “I know it’s only been a couple of months, but you need to know this because I can’t see myself not being with you anytime in the near future. Meaning there are going to be more days like this, whether it’s you feeling off, or me! While I try to let you know just how much I care about you everyday, I want you to remember especially on the hard days that you are so important; to the people you call family, to the people you work with, to the people you smile at, to our friends, to my family, to me. God, y/n, you mean the world to me.”

You could feel tears start to build up on your lash line. Usually you’d try and hide away when you started to get emotional, but between Beomgyu’s firm hands holding you and his own watery eyes staring intently into yours, you couldn’t bring yourself to pull away.

“While I want you to be the happiest person everyday of your life and never have to cry, I know personally how that isn’t healthy or fair of me to put on you,” Beomgyu said, his voice starting to become wobbly, “So whenever you feel like this, I want you to know that I understand. And if you’ll have me, I’ll be here.”

The tears were already falling, from both your eyes and his, but you didn’t care. All you could feel was Beomgyu’s heart beating under your hand as you slowly moved it to rest on his chest. Your heart rate matched his easily, speeding up just the tiniest bit as Beomgyu moved his hand to rest on top of yours.

“Gyu…”

“Please have me, Y/n. I really, really like you. And I want to be here, no matter what kind of day it is,” he whispered now, the words slowly getting lower the closer you inched to him.

You let out the smallest laugh, as if the peaceful feeling filling your stomach was floating through your lungs to now fill the small space between you and your boyfriend's lips. The laugh was a tinkly, kind sound that seemed to have reached Beomgyu, because the tears running down his cheeks were overtaken by his dimples you so famously adored. Your laugh sounded out, but the smile on your face remained as you started to cup his cheek and lightly trace over his dimple.

“God…you mean the world to me too, Beomgyu,” you whispered.

Your voice sent shivers down Beomgyu’s spine, and the way he sighed in awe at your words made you lean forward to close the space between you two, your lips finally connecting after what felt like too long.

His hands shifted to tugging you even closer as he sighed in the kiss. You hummed against his lips as well, relishing in the way he deepened the kiss, a bit desperately as if he couldn’t possibly get enough of you. You couldn’t complain, as you felt the exact same. And as you felt the connection between you both deepen, you could also feel the tightness in your chest melt away.

While you knew your problems/feelings weren’t something Beomgyu could kiss away, you knew he would understand. You knew he would be there. And you knew he would care.

And for now, that was enough to get you out of bed the next morning with a smile, ready to take on another day.

(additional) notes: just wanted to say that while this beomgyu isn’t real, i hope y’all know that everything this one said is still true. if y’all need anything, message me or any of the ones mentioned and watch some to do :)

#tomorrow x tomorrow #txt #beomgyu x reader #choi beomgyu #choi beomgyu x reader #txt x reader #beomgyu #beomgyu imagines #txt fluff #beomgyu fluff

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causenessus · 6 months ago

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love notes

part 0.12. SUPPORT SMALL BUSINESSES DAY

"trace me onto you."

from title fight, left in saitozaki, fukuoka

prev. | m.list | next

extras <3

INKED AND MY BISQUE BEAU REFERENCES!!! DEFINITELY PLEASE GO CHECK OUT THESE FICS THEY ARE AMAZING <3 (thank u to @eggyrocks and @wyrcan <33)

AND THANK U AGAIN TO EGGY FOR THEIR AWESOME PLAYLIST <33 LET'S GO TITLE FIGHT

atsumu acted so offended when y/n immediately tagged him saying kiyoko was off limits but he was definitely thinking about asking for her phone number...but that's bc he's an idiot

when suna saw y/n's tweets about buying her coffee he texted osamu like "hey what if u dropped off coffee for y/n and ur girlfriend. i'll pay"

osamu is trying his hardest to maintain that they are NOT dating (yet) but he's secretly getting giddy everytime someone calls mbb y/n his girlfriend (SORRY LMAOOO FOR ANYONE WHO HASN'T READ MBB THIS IS PROBABLY CONFUSING THAT JUST MEANS U SHOULD GO READ IT!!!)

he also (pretending to complain about it) agreed to drop off coffee but he's a gentleman and paid for mbb y/n's coffee and suna paid for (love notes) y/n's coffee <3

double dates between the two in the future?? both pairs are so cute 👀

WAIT AND TRIPLE DATE WITH KIYOKO AND INKED Y/N??? hold on i'm cooking

suna and y/n are both fighting for their lives trying to remain casual but they are literally the FARTHEST THING from acting casual

gonna reinforce this again but literally all the art suna sends y/n is actually stuff he's put up with her in mind <3

and suna got too nervous to say anything about how he feels to y/n because the timing just didn't feel right and then she was like "oh i forget we haven't been BEST FRIENDS forever"

he was biting his fist and going thru the five stages of grief trying to interpret the deeper meanings of that text

and atsumu was not sleeping yet while suna was texting y/n (and technically he did not giggle, it was just like little huffs of laughter whenever she said something cute, yk?)

but they both shut off their phones and immediately went to bed after seeing omi's reply they were literally laying in the dark terrified they were going to hear footsteps and banging on their door

i love including my own experiences in my writing (yes i was forced to learn relative tuning before ANYTHING else in a guitar class and then my high e string broke and attacked me </3)

and!! actually the picture suna uses on his twitter (the "i miss you) is a picture i took in new york <3 if u were wondering why it looks so ugly

and an extra note to provide more context for next chapter!! this away game is the last one before winter break <3 y/n mentioned the holidays in her earthen kiln post because next chapter will be about winter break just so everything is clear <3

taglist: @0moonii @iluvmang @bluebeanbee @oyasumeii @froyaoya @gyuijns @nbcvs @milkteade @guitarstringed-scars @makkir0ll @mylahrins @cherrypieyourface @vivian-555 @sharkerino @r0seandth0rns @staileykout @lunavixia @thvvluvr @elliott0o0 @wolffmaiden @rockleeisbaeeee @toges-cough-syrup @cnnmairoll @ryeyeyer @hibernatinghamster @localgaytrainwreck @lemonocity @bows4life @sereniteav @madiexuberant @eclecticeggknightpsychic @phoenix-eclipses @sonicsolos @httpakkeiji @brkfclub @snail-squasher @starry-magicshop @cr4yolaas @kitnootkat @zzzlevislothzzz @iluv-ace @iluvaquaphor @stayyyyyyyyyyyy21 @applepi25 @twiishaa @girlkissersco @sleepystrwbrryy @encrypta

#suna rintarou #suna rintaro #rintarou suna #suna #sunarin #suna x reader #suna smau #suna x reader smau #suna x reader fluff #haiykuu smau #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu #hq #hq x reader #ness' planet ⋆⭒˚.⋆

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shavirlight · 4 months ago

Text

IWTV Fic Masterpost

From most to least recent. Make sure to carefully read the tags as well as the warnings for the relevant fics, and proceed at your own discretion. Will be adding to this list as I post more fic <3 You can now also read my Louis/Lestat oneshots in chronological order.

🔥 The House Was a Funeral Pyre 🔥 | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 74.6k, warning: canon-typical everything) - COMPLETE!

In the cold grime of 1910 Paris, with loud steps over wet pavement, an inebriated group of young bohemians were exiting a small theater and making their way home. They were shouting, rambunctious with laughter, and one of the men was dancing, bathed in the streetlight glow.

He was beautiful.

Louis watched from the above in the dark, from the top of the steps leading down to the dirty path. He stood between the shadows, and for the first time in almost one hundred years, felt the draw of the warm light below.

Louis and Lestat, in reverse.

Surrender and Win | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 4.0k)

It’s difficult to remember when the last time Lestat had the upper hand over him like this was. There is something to the struggle, though, to the merciless push and pull that Louis finds he craves, and it feels good to be defeated at times. Lestat is a ruthless opponent, and to surrender to him can be its own form of release, but—Louis has never begged for it. He cannot. Fortunately, he’ll never need to. At the height of Louis and Lestat's "casual" arrangement, a power struggle ensues.

Dwell Where You Are Safe | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 5.1k)

Louis is a man of infuriating, addictive contradictions. Lestat had thought that following his and Claudia’s calamitous chess game, he would grow cold to him. Inexplicably, it seems to have produced the opposite effect. Or: after the chess game, Lestat struggles to make sense of his lover’s sudden, overwhelming lust.

Perpetual 1908 | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 6.3k)

This is a new side of Lestat, one that accepts Louis’ rule and lets himself be guided by his hand. There is a longing in him, a need for release from his own impulses, from his own sense of control. Has Paris done this to him, as well? Filled him with too many sorrows for keeping, made him crave a departure from his own mind? Louis buys Lestat a watch. The gift is well-received.

Five Memories in the Vaults of Your Mind | Armand/Louis (mature, 6.9k)

There are things in Armand’s past, people and moments and long stretches of times, years, decades—that he would not have objected to forgetting. If a benevolent being came along and offered to erase them for him, to blur the feelings that came with their memories, offered to take it all away and cradle Armand’s mind in its loving palm… he would have fallen to his knees and wept with relief. Or: five things Louis would like to forget.

Haul Away Together | Louis/Lestat, Louis/The Sailor (explicit, 5.7k, warning: noncon elements with the sailor)

It’s like something pulled directly from Louis’ teenage mind; the bright, muscular sailor, ruddy with arousal as he shrugs off his shirt with easy confidence. Louis wonders if Lestat knew, somehow, of this forgotten fantasy of his youth. If it’s part of why it seems to be coming true, now. Three nights after Louis is turned, Lestat brings home a gift.

Words On Screen | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 6.9k)

It’s a text from Lestat, with an image attached. He does that sometimes, sends Louis pictures of things he thinks he would enjoy, though the vast majority of them are painfully pedestrian; a statue from the 18th century, a lamp had Lestat bought for his apartment, a man on the street with a pet parrot—on one occasion, a picture of a tree. Lestat claimed he ‘thought Louis would appreciate its unique Byzantine shape’.

Really, the pictures themselves are meaningless—they function, utterly transparently, as excuses to contact Louis. Little digital lures, meant to pull him into Lestat’s orbit once more. This is a sexting fic.

See / Exit | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 8.7k)

Louis is living for himself—which means doing what he wants, and being honest about what it is. So what if he flew across the world, attended Lestat’s concert, got hot and bothered watching him perform and waited for him in his dressing room? So what if upon seeing Lestat, he immediately went to his knees to give him a blowjob so dirty he thought he might come just from giving it? It’s not a big deal. At least, it doesn’t have to be. Or: five times Louis waits for Lestat in his dressing room, and one time Lestat is already there.

Burrow | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 8.7k, warning: dubcon)

Louis is tired a lot, these days. Lestat watches as he hunts human, makes sure he stays well-nourished and full, and so he knows that isn’t the reason. A voice from within him, a cruel one, wants to whisper to him—but Lestat banishes it from his mind. He will simply have to work harder, tonight, to rouse his beloved – a small challenge like this shouldn’t deter. Lestat will have him hard and begging in no time. Since their reconciliation, Louis has become more agreeable. Maybe too agreeable.

the body, not in stasis | Daniel/Louis, (explicit, 1.9k)

“The need to cares for your body is, in part, what tethers you to it. It’s a reminder, Daniel—that you are flesh and blood. That you are a human being,” Louis insists, in his usual verbose fashion, and Daniel can’t help but laugh as he turns to leave. “Well, you’re welcome to come watch, if it’s so magical to you,” he says.

Want and Swallow and Keep | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 10.7k, warning: dubcon)

Love, sex, possession. To Lestat, they’re all the same thing. So this could be perfect; Louis could decide what they do, control Lestat’s actions. He could make Lestat work for it, earn Louis’ trust again by way of obedience. Louis could restrain him from doing something—something bad.

Of Mercy, With Choice | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 6.2k)

“I always thought that your victims were truly fortunate, to be gifted with such an exhilarating death,” Lestat says, tangled in the messy sheets. “What bliss it must have been, to be killed by one so beautiful.” Louis and Lestat play at a fantasy. It gets a bit out of hand.

A Chill That Follows | Louis/Armand/Dreamstat (explicit, 4.9k)

Armand wants him, wants him bad—is willing to go against the coven to hold him. Louis can work with that, he’s good at figuring out which buttons to push, how to get what he needs. And this is what he needs right now; to feel a man’s touch after going without for so long. He wants Armand, too. Louis lets Armand in. Or at least, he tries to. There's a complication.

To Make a Real Home | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 5.4k, warning: dubcon)

Louis is hovering a few steps behind him as he tucks the girl in, as gently as he can—she needs to heal, and it will likely take some time. Lestat can feel Louis’ gaze on his back, can feel the anxiety radiating from him as he watches from a distance, stock-still as if afraid to disturb the ritual taking place in front of him. It makes Lestat feel cold. Emotions run high in the aftermath of Claudia's turning.

And the Knowing Is Sweet, Too | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 6.6k)

For his own peace of mind, Louis had to get Lestat out of that miserable shack. He rented him a fully furnished apartment not too far from Rue Royale, then purchased a new, elegant coffin for him to sleep in. Next, a modern wardrobe to help him blend in with the mortals. And finally, he bought him a piano—a nice one, too. He assured Lestat that it was all a loan, just until he got his finances in order. The piano, though, was a gift. And now it was time for Louis to go home.

See What Happens | Daniel/Louis, (explicit, 6.3k)

So this is happening. This extremely stupid, thrilling professional and personal mistake that he’s making with the 100-year-old serial killer he’s supposed to be interviewing. Daniel steels himself – it’s happening, and he’s in it, and there’s no point in turning back now. He has to see where it goes. Daniel stumbles into a game he doesn't understand.

New Ways for Old Things | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 3.8k, warning: this fic is old)

Louis is sure that the burns are painful, but Lestat’s reactions seem to indicate something beyond a simple physical thrill. It’s as if this old game is unveiling a brand new side of them.

Seek His Face and Turn | Louis/Lestat (explicit, 2.8k, warning: dubcon, and this fic is also old)

Louis can’t help but feel that nothing has truly changed. Lestat is simply humouring his latest whim, to play the overpowering predator to Lestat’s helpless victim in some mockery of a payback. Every night Louis berates himself for participating in this charade, and every morning he falls asleep in Lestat’s arms, spent and resigned. It’s never truly what he wants it to be, anyway, and it’s only a matter of time before this new game loses its novelty. After taking Lestat back, Louis bargains.

#iwtv fic #interview with the vampire #iwtv #loustat #loustat fic #long post

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writingstoraes · 2 years ago

Note

Secret trip part two? With like the guests pictures, well wishes and some honeymoon posts from the newly weds 🤞😍

the days after 🏝

pairing: charles leclerc/fem!reader

type: instagram imagine, social media au (heavier on the ig part hehe)

notes: thank you sm for requesting, lovely! i hope you like this 🤍 reqs are still open! (tho patience is required i have varying levels of productivity lol) posting next would be the part 3 of split! lmk if anyone wants to be tagged hehe

about: after revealing the private wedding you and charles had in italy, here's what came after!

this is the part 2 to secret trip! read it here.

carlossainz55

liked by pierregasly, landonorris, charles_leclerc, and 984,221 others

carlossainz55 Suited up and attended something 🥂

pierregasly What's with the mystery everyone knows Charles and Y/N got married

carlossainz55 Mind your own Insta, thank you very much?

scuderiaferrari Looking sharp, Smooth Operator! ❤️

danielricciardo Okay we see you Mr. Secrecy 😁

carlossainz55 I'm not hiding anything????

landonorris People literally know you attended a wedding

carlossainz55 IT WAS JUST A CAPTION? Can't I post a picture of myself in peace? 55sainzz LMAOOO THEY WONT LET HIM BREATHE 😭

pierregasly

liked by arthurleclerc, lorenzotl, yourusername, and 564,983 others

pierregasly Somewhere in Italy, two of my greatest friends tied the knot. Congratulations to the two best people I know ❤️ Grateful to be a part of this magical day and I only wish you two the happiest of days. Seems like it was just yesterday when Charles was boasting how you finally texted him back 🤣

estebanocon I am not the best person you know?

landonorris Hurts, right?

charles_leclerc The last part was uncalled for... but yeah I was proud :D

charlesmcqueen hes been whipped for her ever since god i have seen what you have done for others

danielricciardo See carlossainz55 this is how you do a greeting

carlossainz55 I am going to post one can you all wait damn

danielricciardo

liked by lewishamilton, maxverstappen, georgerussell63, and 849,273 others

danielricciardo Almost a year ago, Charles and Y/N asked me to take some pictures of them to commemorate their engagement. Believe it or not, these pictures are outtakes and unplanned. I happened to catch such beautiful moments between the two of them and now I just witnessed them celebrate their love for each other.

Congratulations, yourusername and charles_leclerc!

landonorris Another smashing greeting related to the wedding, carlossainz55 can't relate 🙏

carlossainz55 I am about to block all of you

yourusername melting at your caption aside, why am i only seeing this now, daniel?

danielricciardo Saved it for a second wedding gift 😁

gaslyscar Jesus i am never going to experience this am I 😪

lewishamilton

liked by charles_leclerc, mercedesamgf1, susiewolff, and 1,001,223 others

lewishamilton Was not able to snap some pictures from the wedding but luckily, I have this in my gallery from all the times I have spent third-wheeling with them. I think the smiles on their faces say it all. Congratulations, newlyweds! 🤵👰

charles_leclerc Million thanks for telling me what her name was, mate 😆

lewishamilton You're also welcome for the texts I helped you construct cause you were too afraid to send one britcedesbro sir lewis hamilton professional matchmaker???

carlossainz55 At this point who hasn't third-wheeled with them?

yourusername hey you guys make it seem like it's a bad thing charles_leclerc And we pay the bill to compensate???

carlossainz55

liked by maxverstappen, charles_leclerc, yourusername, and 678,234 others

carlossainz55 Such an unbelievable experience to witness Charles and Y/N's journey as a couple. A witness since their first date, the first time Charles introduced her to Ferrari team members, the day Charles told me he was out picking a ring, up to being the first to receive the good news that Y/N said yes. I only wish you guys eternal moments of love, happiness, and peace ❤️

And before the entire grid comes at me for this, yes I am capable of doing a proper greeting. Thanks.

yourusername hmm, seems like you're doing this to prove something, carlito

charles_leclerc Totally, out of spite carlossainz55 I cannot catch a break from all of you 😐

landonorris Their faces aren't visible

pierregasly Where are our pictures??? carlossainz55 That's it, hard blocking all of you

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, arthurleclerc, and 341,886 others

yourusername maldives with the man i recently got my last name from 🏖️

pierregasly Enjoy, newlyweds ❤️

landonorris Bring me home some shell necklaces

charles_leclerc When did you take that shot of me

yourusername when you were busy saying the stone formation kinda looks like the rock 🥱

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, pierregasly, maxverstappen, and 1,290,472 others

charles_leclerc Honeymoon stop 2: Iceland 🏞️ Beautiful place with my beautiful wife.

scuderiaferrari Have fun, Y/N and Charles! ❤️

arthurleclerc Me? An uncle?

yourusername no one said that, arthur 😆

forzacharles i too would wanna travel the world during my honeymoon with my significant other, all i need is a significant other

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, pierregasly, yourbff, and 432,208 others

yourusername various shots from our many stops. adventures with you surely does not stop here. excited to spend forever with you, charles_leclerc 🤍

landonorris I am expecting my shell necklace any moment now

carlossainz55 Can't even wait for them to unpack?

charles_leclerc Pour toujours et à jamais, mon amour 💋 Forever and always, my love.

lovingleclerc MY FAVEEE COUPLE <3

sainzzlecs my parents exactly

------------

tagging: @slytherheign, @honethatty12, @siovhanroy

notes: its actually been so long since i did an imagine that's purely ig lmao i find it hard now to not include twitter panels but anyway! i hope you like this anon <3 lmk what u guys think hehe btw reqs for charles imagines are open hehe (pls lend some patience if u send one tho) thank you for reading 🤍

posting next would be the part 3 of split! lmk if anyone wants to be tagged hehe

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